June, 2022:
An American, a Russian, and a Mexican are stranded on an island after a ship wreck. The next day, a crate-full of expensive liqueur washes up on the beach and the castaways decide to play lots to claim its full ownership. The American & the Russian decide to measure their dicks to decide who wins. Meanwhile, the Mexican drinks up the contents of the crate as both idiots waste time discussing foreskin rules.
The lesson? Focus.
This month marks the 6th anniversary on my cancer diagnosis. 4th stage, if it matters. Meaning, that this bitch has been coursing thru my veins since 2016, like a banshee out of hell. Yet, I've been lucky to of tamed the shit out of it thanks to not only science, but my cheery disposition. I'm going on cycle 34 (30 months) of the Repotrectinib trail which has been a life saver and a fucking curse. This first half of 2022 I was told I progressed again (5th time) and almost bumped off the trail. But thanks to ongoing 2nd & 3rd opinions from a Neurosurgeon & Radiation Oncologist, I'm back in the game like a god-damned Phoenix with a weak spark.
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| My attitude taste like burning. |
Focus has the main contributor to my well being. Sure, the Avant guard meds too, but there is much to be said about placebos and happy thoughts. Often, my mind & spirit was poisoned with greed, envy & jealousy. Like a fucking viper that bit itself to prove something. In the end, I didn't gain much other than a weak disposition that was threatened by things I've never accomplished, Meaning, my grass was never as green as the Jones'.
That's what cancer does. It fucks with your mind into thinking how you've wasted your life.
But you can learn to lift yourself from that. Cancer makes you slow down and appreciate the small things in life. Sounds cliché, sure. But fuck if it isn't true.
I'm grateful for cancer, in that it helped surface a side in me I never knew existed. It's nice to be conscious of this and still stop to smell the roses, or see my daughters grow.
Life is indeed a blessing.
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| Perpetual Blessing |
And there is always this:
