Cancer Man II

Looking back at my life I realize that I've lived like a pinball. Not really having a destined path as I rolled around, but ultimately being propelled in a certain direction after "bumping" on a circumstance that came across my way. Subsequently reacting to this event and adapting as best as I could to flourish. To succeed. But I guess this is what's called evolving. Maturing. Growing a pair.



As a young kid in Mexico I've always dreamed of working with art in whatever capacity it would be. But this was a huge pipe dream and really did not expect this to happen. My parents were practical minded, and for them art was just not an endeavor that would take me anywhere. Much less making a living out of it. I buried this pipe dream and took a safe approach by studying Accounting where I eventually worked in a bank for several months. I wound up quitting this shit show as I hated it, but still needed to make some legal tender. So, I started cleaning engine parts in my Dad's forklift shop. I went from suit & tie to dirty overalls overnight. Yet, the art spirit kept pestering me. And as much as I attempted to drown it out I finally succumbed to it by finding an offbeat outlet from which it can express itself.



Early in my teens I was exposed to graffiti art and was fascinated by the creativity that was being done in New York. It lit a certain fire within me where I realized that art wasn't just limited to paintings hanging in museums. All the more surprising was realizing that these artists were not paid for their work. It was simply their deliberate sense of giving expression to what they had conceived within their mind. A temporary record of their thought that ultimately would disappear behind a power-wash. I began to sketch during my breaks and after a while started tagging the shop's walls. Originally, I did this to impress a cute girl that lived across the street, but this was a defining moment for me.



Adding color to that cinder block wall was an awakening. The creative spirit took over me with an overwhelming sense of peace, calm, and happiness. Time stopped. Nothing else mattered. I wept silent tears of joy upon realizing what defined me at my core. Creativity & Expression.



This eventually faded once my break time was over and it was back to cleaning parts for the day. And, as the weeks/months rolled by this dream was buried again. Power-washed by my sense of duty in needing to be realistic when it comes to a job.



Yet, my pinball continued to roll...



tbc